i had another appointment today, which came so quickly, i’m not even sure i talked about the last one. either way, here’s the latest.
as of today i am 37 weeks and 4 days along. i lost a pound, putting me back at 17 total gained. blood pressure was good. baby’s heart beat was 145 today. and after being checked i had an ultrasound to confirm what dr phillips thought…baby is still breech and it seems that’s where this little one wants to be. it must be comfy cozy and settled in there. so…next week, we’ll see if it’s still hanging tight there and make a plan of what to do. the options are trying to turn baby perry and/or scheduling a c-section. this isn’t really coming as a shock to me today by any means…the talk has been there and therefore my pretty big disappointment has had time to sink in. i have decided not to dwell on what i am missing out on potentially -and rather be so very thankful that the baby is healthy and i made it this far. what ultimately is important is getting baby p here safe and sound. so in time (a short time) we will see what will happen.
for those of you that don’t know (which is just about everyone) there is a special side to this baby, to this pregnancy. when mark and i went for one of our very early ultrasounds, we learned that i have what is called a bicornuate uterus. basically it means that it is heart shaped instead of the “regular” shape. there are varying degrees from being slightly heart shaped to being almost completely seperated. and really they can’t be sure what kind you have without actually seeing it. our doctors (one reason i love them so very much) told us not to worry, that usually everything is fine and they’d keep a watch on it. and then i went home and researched (i know, i know…this is not a good idea) you can look for yourself and see why. most internet information is bad…worst case scenario, what i vowed to not be like during pregnancy. afterall we are not in control of any of this, thank goodness may i add. but i was a little freaked out by what i read…can’t carry full term, multiple miscarriages, preterm labor, babies can’t live, etc etc. but we talked to dr mcdaniel and again she reassured us not to worry. and somehow, we did just that. we let go and trusted god. and we decided not to really talk about it to anyone. it wasn’t personal. we just didn’t want to hear everyone’s fears, and their worst case scenarios (people like to tell you the bad..why is that?) okay…skip ahead to 25ish weeks and i was checked earlier than normal. in my mind i knew why…”we don’t want a 25 week baby” they said. all was good and at that point the baby’s chances were getting better. then at my 29 or 30 week appointment dr mcdaniel let the worry cat out of the bag by saying what a big deal it was that i’d gotten to that point. i guess they were more concerned than they had let on. and at 34, she was thrilled i’d made it. we were told there’d be no stopping things if they started then. now at each appointment, the doctors say how surprised they are that the little one hasn’t come yet. we’ve made it!
our baby grew in a heart that beat the odds against it. we are so thankful.